Sunday, August 27, 2006

يوم النّقد العالمي

غالبا" ما تمرّ الأحداث على المرء دون الاتّصال بتفاصيلها... ولكن لا بدّ من الاشارة الى أهميتها خاصّة" في تسلسل أيّامي :

- " أكشن !"
يدخل الممثّل الى المطعم، يجلس بتوتّر تجاه البطلة يجمعهما عصير برتقال على شرشفٍ أخضرو ذلك تحت تأثير موسيقى كلاسيكيّة. وطبعا" اضافة الكومبارس هو أمر لا بدّ منه: أشخاصٍ تتبادل الحديث في الوقت عينه،فتيات تحضنّ كتبهنّ بطريقة عنيفة وأناس تتدفّق بالمرور أمام البطلين..

- أحمد، ما تسبنيش يا حبيبي!! خلاص، أنا ما عدتش أستحمل الوضع ده.
- يا ليلى، أرجوك، استنّي لما أتخرج و آخد الشّهادة. بعديها أنا مستعد أروح عند باباكِ.

" زااب "
أنتقل الى محطّة أخرى، فيظهر لي احد المسلسلات اللّبنانيّة الّتي تعتمد السّيناريو المتفلسف والخارج عن الواقع. فيه تظهر كلّ الأسماء العربيّة الّتي تبتعد عن الطّائفيّة ،كزياد مثلا"، كريم، جاد، سهى، رلى، الخ...

- رجاع لتشوف ولادك عم يكبروا . كل يوم هو بذرة بتزرعا حد بيتك و بغفلة بتشوف الحياة قدمتلك أثمن هدية: تربة أرضك!! وهون لح تركع تحت السّما و تبوس الأرض مرّة بعد مرّة حتّى تحس انو بعدك عطشان، و بدّك تفتّش ع اخر قطرة أمل لترتوي و ترجع تشرق من جديد بعالم ما بتشوف فيه الاّ صفحات مطويّة..

"زاااب"

-أحبّكْ دون فابرسيو...آه، لطالما......."زااااااااااااب"

عندئذٍ، و لإراحة رأسي من ضوضاءِ رتابة التلفاز، أخرج الى الشّرفة كي "أستمتع" بالمشاهد الطبيعيّة:

أحد الجيران يستمع الى آياتٍ قرآنيّة. و ما هي الاّ هنيهات حتّى يستقيل ايمانه و يستبدل بالأرواح الفنيّة: يا طبطب و دلّع، وكلّ ما يرافق الهراء من معنى..

و ها قد ظهر "علي"،أشهر من أن يعرّف. الصّبيّ الّذي كبرت عضلات جسمه بين ليلةٍ و ضحاها و هو لم يتعدّ الخامس عشربعد:
- يا حيوان! شو بااااك؟؟؟
و هنا، ينهال على رفيقه الآخر بالضّرب و يطرحه أرضا".فيرمقني في هذه الأئناء بنظرةٍ استعارها من الّليث . لعلّه يقنعني أنّه ينتمّي الى أسرة شمشون أو هرقل.
. و من ثمّ، يعلو صوت أمّه:
- يا علا (مع فتح العين و اللأّم أيضا")، اطلع عل البيت هلق يا حيوان!!!

أعود الى الدّاخل،
أدير التّلفاز....

28 Comments:

Blogger nado said...

hahhaha good one.
3alyki afkar ya benet, smallah bala 7asad.. bt3ejbni ;)

bokra bykbar ebn el 15 seneh w bye32al, khali yitshaytan hala2, le7e2 3al ham...

10:28 AM  
Blogger hashem said...

hahaha
So, funny, Do7a...so funny.
I miss zapping....I miss it!
(I barely touch the remote control...I only open the TV here for a background noise)

12:49 PM  
Blogger Eve said...

;D
walaw min ma b ya3ref aley. the zapping was funny!

12:56 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Farah:
hehehehehehhehehe:)yalli ma bya3ref Ali khoser ktir,kil hakyo msabbet w ahama wehdi:ya hayawen!
The post is funny sis;)

4:38 AM  
Blogger Eve said...

walla walla sitt farah hon! sharfina mademoiselllllle

8:59 AM  
Blogger RAT said...

يا الله يا ضحى ما اهضمك موتيني من الضحك

10:55 AM  
Blogger Jamal said...

ما في شي بينحضر عل"تي في" ليش ما تتسلّي عل انترنت؟

جيدة جيدة

1:35 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hehehehe,yalla eve jeyi la 3indik;)
Farrouha

10:11 PM  
Blogger doha said...

welcome farrouha
i suggest you create ur own blog.u see, u can write topics like:"how to solve an algebra problem"-fiscaliteh, or
"my sweet mobile",ya3ni...
anyway, ya ahla w sahla frangine:):)

11:20 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Farrouha:
Hehehehehe,well,if i did so, i bet no one will visit me;)so i will just give u my blessings u and eve;)
btw,chta2tella lal fiscalite:)nye22222

1:58 AM  
Blogger hashem said...

ok...this is turning so family oriented... :)
just a chance to say to Farah: hi..! :) :)

9:49 AM  
Blogger All Seeing Eye said...

post ra2i3.

9:42 PM  
Blogger hillz said...

jamal!
ma tesre2leh jayydeh jayydeh.
eih do7a.. jaydeh ;)

bas kein lezim tzeedeeha ba3ed bil mosalsaleit ellebneieniyyeh khassatan iza 3am te7dareh marwan najjar.. w 3andik 3yoonon ebazzeeen kamein.
:D

7:13 AM  
Blogger Ana Min Beirut said...

Doha, very funny, and uncanny ability to concentrate on the details ... I want more on 3aleeeee
& Now that I think of it, I am going to tell about Aboul Zooz ...tej rass zo3ran el Achrafieh ....Soon soon ...
Keep Zapping

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